When Hoarders Make Life Miserable

I read a Wall Street Journal article that was good on one hand and slammed professional organizers and the therapeutic community on the other hand. From the point of view of a child of a hoarder, they are tired of having the hoarder get all of the consideration while the children are ignored. This might be a common scenario for the child of a hoarder. They might have been ignored by the hoarding parent or parents and are still being ignored by their parent/s. That article can be found at: file:///Users/admin/Desktop/When%20Hoarders%20Make%20Life%20Miserable%20for%20Others%20-%20WSJ.com.webarchive

The person that made many good comments was Elizabeth Nelson, who is the spokesperson for the website "Children of Hoarders" http://www.childrenofhoarders.com.

She makes the point that the hoarder is portrayed as the victim in most situations, and all those involved in the life of the hoarder tiptoe around the hoarder. She advocates action against the worse cases of hoarding to protect the hoarder. There has to be a middle ground, and that is what I am exploring. Please weigh in on this issue.

Life of your dreams

"The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams." This was a quote from Oprah Winfrey. What is the life of your dreams? It is a fascinating question and one that I would like to spend a day or a week or a year going around and asking all that I meet "What would it mean to you to live the life of your dreams?"

For me, I've always dreamed of traveling around the world. Having the time and money to do such a thing is a dream of mine, as far off as it might seem. I can't imagine having the freedom and/or the money to just take off with George and travel the world. Where would I want to start that journey? Maybe I'd start with Australia, or maybe Italy, since I have not been to either of these locations.

I can imagine traveling to many exotic locations. I would have a wonderful time sightseeing and trying to discover the out of the way places that would give me a true sense of what it was like to live in the location I was visiting. I do look forward to a time when I can afford to do that kind of traveling. Right now, it seems like a very far off dream.

I think of this traveling around the world as living a dream, but in my current reality, I am too busy running my business and learning new ways of helping my clients live a simpler, less chaotic life, filled with joy. I live a joyous life and I get great pleasure in doing meaningful work with my wonderful clients. That to me right now is living my dream. I can wait for the traveling at a later time.

If you are interested in world travel, there are some really good travel sites such as: http://www.iexplore.com Check it out.

Can I get kicked off my own blog page?

O.K., the last time I posted it was in October. I know that I might need to blog more for this blog to have any meaning other then my own blog diary. I also need to read and respond to others blogs. I hardly do that, therefore, no other bloggers know that this site exists, with the exception of a few wonderful people that check this out from my website. Thank you to them!

Here is the million dollar question "Where do I get the free time to do this?" I am a professional organizer and there is a myth that professional organizers are "Super Heros." Please share where that myth came from and I will "kill the messenger" of that myth. We humans have to understand where our priorities lie, and mine have not been blogging, obviously. If anyone is reading this blog, feel free to respond to the questions posed within this text.

On to a bit of information for all those that find hoarding information very important, interesting and useful. Check out 65 Ways To Start the Conversation About Hoarding by Catherine MacDonald @ HowToHelpAHoarder.com

That is all the time I have for this blog. Good night.

We have come to know that parents who are involved in their children's education, play a huge role in their child's success at school and throughout their child's lifetime of successes. If you receive a request or a recommendation that your child might benefit from an ADHD assessment, this can be treated like any other recommendation - ask a lot of questions until you are satisfied that this path suits your child. Keep in mind that although there are still mistakes or abuses in the labeling of ADHD kids, the more important problem is under-diagnosing. A child with undiagnosed ADHD faces a lifetime of challenges that can be mitigated by their parents early intervention. For the latest research, go to www.chadd.org, Children and Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder. The CHADD site is a superior resource for parents and children with ADHD. In addition to CHADD, the National Association of Professional Organizers' (NAPO) New York chapter is hosting Sari Solden, who is an ADD psychotherapist and a pioneer on ADD and women. Join Sari Solden on November 7th as she presents "Understanding the Secret World of Women with AD/HD. For more information visit NAPO-NY's site at www.napo-ny.net.

Holiday Giving

I can not believe that it is almost the end of October? Where the heck did the time go? It will be Halloween in a few days and then we’ll start thinking about Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, New Year’s and so forth. It’s all coming at us so very fast and furious. The recession may have changed the way we will be buying this holiday season.

There are many people that don’t have jobs right now and they may be our friends, our neighbors or former colleagues. Those that do have jobs , many of them have had to take pay cuts to keep their jobs. You can bet there are changes that we are all making in our personal lives that will impact how we celebrate the upcoming holidays.

For way too long, the holidays have been about stuff–the stuff we get and the food we stuff down our throats. The upcoming holidays are supposed to be about family and friends, thanksgiving and compassion, redemption and forgiveness, new beginnings and old traditions, love and sacred beliefs. Too often, the focus shifts to finding batteries for the barrage of toys to come, wrapping paper, and shopping deals. Take a moment or two this year to think about those who are still struggling. Have your children (nieces and nephews) buy a few gifts for those children that will not have anything this holiday season. Think about giving money or food to your local food banks for those who are hungry. You can send a box to a U.S. soldier through www.AnySoldier.com for those brave men and women that will not be with their family for the holidays.

Please think about giving of yourself and/or your time and helping those who could use your help this holiday season. You will feel better for helping another less fortunate than you. Pass on that lesson to your children, who will also feel better about the simple and selfless act of giving. God bless you and your family this holiday season!

Doing It With Intent-Where are my credit cards???

Well, I have been thinking a lot about the advice I gave my client today regarding "doing things with intent." I know I have discussed intent before, but this time I just want to brush up against the idea of doing something with intent. This will definitely not be the last time I talk about intent either, so get over that!

I go to the store, buy items, get to the cash register and pull out my wallet to pay for the items I just bought. There are a couple of things that could happen here. I could get distracted, drop my wallet, everything spills out, the line gets long, I start worrying about whether I picked up all of my credit cards, money and rolling coins or worry about what all these strangers on this line think of me.

Rule #1, who cares what strangers think? I don't. Rule #2, stop, see where all my money, credit cards and coins just went and retrieve them. Solicit the help of kind strangers to help pick up the rolling coins, #Rule #3, thank everyone for their help, pay bill, leave store with all items safely tucked in wallet and complete and total dignity intact.

Who cares what strangers think, we care about what we think. What does this have to do with intent you ask? Good question. The point is knowing what is in my hand when I whip out the wallet, making sure that I do not rush myself and therefore not pick up my money, etc., not care about the good opinions of others and stop, take a breath, pay my bill, place the wallet and all contents back inside, not rushing and losing more stuff, not caring that the check-out line has to wait an extra minute or two for me to compose myself, stash the cash and happily take my purchase out with me.

Knowing what I have in my hand at all times is about intent. It's about not just moving through life without being plugged into that life. It is about living in the now, really. It's about enjoying the heck out of this NOW!!! It is also being in control of what is in my hand and taking responsibility for where that item goes next.

Good Colleagues

This entry is about my two friends and colleagues that are very special to me. They are Heidi Schulz who resides in Santa Barbara, CA., and Kristin Bergfeld, who resides in NYC. Like me, they work with folks with special needs. Also like me, they work very hard to understand and assist their clients with compassion and respect. All three of us have the opportunity to help people realize that there is hope for them when they feel hopeless.

We are very fortunate to have the opportunity to work with our clients that have tremendous challenges such as hoarding. We work with these truly wonderful clients to help them achieve something that they once thought was only a distant dream, long-term clutter management. You might be asking yourself how this is managed. Well, it is a long road of continual work built around our client's motivation, desire and need for change.

There are others' that play a key role in the work that we do with our clients. These key players are psychiatrists, therapists, social workers, family members and any other support person that wants to be a part of the organizing process (at our client's request). Our hoarding clients can't do the work alone. They need a collaborative team to help and support them throughout their lives, especially when working on long-term clutter management.

I respect and honor these two women for the fine work that they do. I am fortunate to have them in my life! We are cut from the same cloth and are truly digging what we do for a living! How many people can say that they are living their passion? I know that I can!!!

To find out more about the work these two women do, please check out http://www.heidischulz.com and http://www.bergfelds.com